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   Honestly I dont even know what I am doing now. I felt lifeless. I dont have any goals in life. I dont know why I live my life. It is hard to lead this kind of life. Of course there is still certain things I still enjoyed doing like singing and listening to music. Or watching anime. And also i have this little dream of becoming seiyuu or what most people know as voice actor.

   I always have this passion of anything that is voice related. That is why i highly enjoyed singing and also hope to get myself involved in the voice acting industries. In order to reach my dreams, i need to have a clear path that i need to follow to accomplish it. But, i cant see it. My visions of the path that i shall take is very blurry.

   I even thought of taking music but sadly, i cant read musical notes. Plus, i dont think my family will support me. Well, my father is not totally against it everytime when music is brought up i can clearly see the displeased face from certain family members. I dont dare to bring up the subject anymore.

   People is so shallow. Bila sebut suka muzik and pandai nyanyi sikit they will think "Oh, nak jadi penyanyi ehh?". They could only think about how glamour it is jadi artis. Living in fame, have lots of fans and also rich (kononnya). Pfft. Sorry to say but all of that are wrong.? I sing to please myself. Because it makes me feel good. Kalau others also feel the same when i sing terima kasih lah banyak-banyak but sejujurnya when i think about taking music path it is because i felt i really lack knowledge in this area. You know what, im so pissed with myself because i cant play any instruments. Banyak benda i tak tahu lagi that i wish i could learn.

   When there is oral for BM and our task was to act a drama (using our voices only), i felt more than happy to do it. At last, something that i think i could show to people Im good at. I was too excited my heart beated so fast i thought it gonna burst. I tried to put myself in the character's place. How she really felt about waiting for his beloved husband that is not certain when he will come back at the side of the beach everyday. How big her love for her husband that she were able to endure the pain of waiting for him.

   I think of it as a chance to test my ability and really gave my all. Receiving all the good feedbacks from my classmates that i actually made them nearly moved to tears really make me happy. I just want people to approve me to be good at something that I claimed I like doing.

   For now i will keep praying. Hoping to found that little light that will guide me to the right path. That's all for now, bye.